It’s not every day that one turns 51 and passes the half way mark to 100! Deciding to celebrate in style, I got onto the net (how did we survived pre-net) with the plan for a flashy day trip. A little bit of googling uncovered that the cheap London train trips or bargain flights to Paris, Munich or Florence were perhaps a thing of the past. Pre-covid, we had done these for the bargain prices of $100 return. Tight arse Tanya just wasn’t willing to pay the equivalent of $600-$1000 a person for a day away, birthday or not.
A moment of excitement did occur as I found a return flight to Prague for $150 a person. Given we hadn’t been to Prague, this momentarily looked promising. This was swiftly shut down on the realisation that the return flight returned two hours after the first flight arrived. Needless to say the idea of an international day trip was canned and we instead decided on a trip to York.
One might think that the photo above was our hearty breakfast before heading off. Sorry to disappoint. Totally off topic, I had to include it to share our visit to Morisson’s Cafe yesterday and Simon’s lunch. Deciding that we may as well try another grocery store cafe, he enjoyed his £7.99 full English breakfast for lunch. I’m thinking that the Oxley B&B was just as good!
Early on in our marriage we had travelled to York with my mum and perhaps my sister. It’s not that she is easy to forget (younger siblings are always louder and more needy – let’s see if she reads my blogs), but none of us can recall her being there. According to Miss Siri (still wondering what we did pre-net), the drive was going to take us just over two hours so seemed a great option. As any of my regular readers know, I am a terrible passenger when Speedy McQueen is at the wheel. My so called passenger stress syndrome has led to many an argument. I’d like to say that the photo above gives a false sense of perception with a pretty clear road. Don’t let it fool you. More to come later!
A little pre-planning with a mix of tight arse ways, resulted in the refusal to park in the city centre and pay up to £3 an hour. Instead we chose the ‘park and ride’ option. I have to say that this was super easy with a bus being there on our arrival and a bargain £3.50 per person return. My advice for anyone heading to York for a day would be to use this option to save time, money and the stress of driving in the tiny city streets. The bus trip in was about 15 minutes and we opted for the Tower Street stop which was a perfect central location. There are multiple park and ride locations around York so a little bit of investigating prior to arriving is worthwhile.
York, a city built by the Romans in 71AD was captured by the Vikings in 866AD. Aren’t I the knowledgeable historian? Again, thank you Mr or Mrs Net. The history of York is evident in the absolutely picturesque buildings as you stroll through the streets. It didn’t take long for our early start to the day to pay off with a visit to pork scratchings stall for some delicious chilli scratchings. How can one complain when one is consuming a bag full of pig fat? How one will fit into that tiny plane seat in a few days is another question.
One of the biggest sights in York is Shambles, or better known as ‘The Shambles’. Once a street of butchers and trades in medieval times, it is now a tourist magnet due to the quaint cobble stones and gorgeous architecture. Apparently it is now Europe’s most visited street. With school holidays on and an abundance of people, it wasn’t hard to believe this so called fact. I imagine that the dreaded ‘C’ would spread as fast as the plague in the jam packed street and shops. There was definitely no possibility of social distancing. The street having apparently inspired Diagon Alley in Harry Potter, capitalised with multiple HP themed shops with people queuing to enter. I would like to say that we looked in all of the stores but this was an outright lie. With so many people, we strolled up and down and enjoyed the atmosphere instead. Only time will tell if we have been hit with the 2022 plague!
What birthday (or day) wouldn’t be enjoyable without a few treats. It’s not hard to turn a corner in York and find something delicious. I would like to say that I was satisfied with the consumed pig fat but there was just enough room for another treat. We had walked for a whole 30-60 minutes so that was a good enough excuse for me. Simon opted for the York Scotch Egg, a traditional Scotch Egg wrapped in bacon (sorry he scoffed it too fast for photographing the inside) and I opted for an apple and pulled pork pie. Simon managed to photograph me consuming but somehow managed to get more of the bag than the pie. The pie bag that is! Speaking of bags, don’t be fooled by the slightly greying hair. It’s not my 51 years but rather a little too much purple toner last night.
Full of food again, we visited the York Museum Gardens (not to be confused with the York Castle Museum). I’m always up for a FREE activity. With halloween upon us, the zillion children running around the gardens were able to locate the ‘ghost women’ hidden amongst the trees. With much excitement (and noise) they ran around locating the mesh ghosts. I did consider hiding behind one and screeching so that they really did have something to scream about but apparently that isn’t the appropriate thing to do. And before you think it, yes I do like children……especially when they are calm and quiet.
As we strolled back from the gardens, a certain sign caught my eye and offered ‘half decent scones’. This presented a challenge that needed to be taken and who am I to argue, especially given it was my birthday. The cafe, just across from York Minster, was a perfect stop to rest tired feet and enjoy a British tradition. I must say, there is something fabulous about clotted cream. I am also proud to say that there was no repeat of the infamous ‘millionaire’s hot chocolate cream gate’. Simon ordered the traditional Parkin with some extra clotted cream. I would have photographed this ginger cake but my own two hands one mouth disease got in the way and he had consumed it before I realised.
One might wonder why I have included a photo of a lone woman standing with a toe pointed. I would like to state that the partner of this woman deserves to be sainted as he was forced to repeatedly take photos of her posing in front of the church. As I consumed my scone and watched on, partner took photo, woman checked photo, woman gave phone back to partner, woman strikes another pose, partner took photo, woman check photo and the whole cycle continued. I had consumed scone (perhaps a little quickly) and consumed two pots (yes pots not cups) of tea and the woman was still being photographed for the perfect insta photo. By take 42, either partner had told her to stick her toe pointing pose or she was finally happy with the outcome. I did suggest to Simon that I need to be more picky with his photography but his response can’t be shared in writing. Needless to say, my photos won’t be insta perfect!
Exiting the cafe we headed across the road to the church only to find the woman and partner now trying to get a photo up closer. The thought of photobombing was entertained but we were definitely on a time frame and couldn’t risk the time it would take to bomb 50 odd photos. Instead we walked over to the church line up to find that the entrance fee was equivalent to $25 a person. No wonder there are such riches in these buildings! Tight arse Tanya wasn’t willing to part with her hard earned money to possibly go up in flames as she walked into holy territory. Perhaps I should have asked for the birthday special. I’m pretty sure we went in when we visited over 20 years ago so was satisfied that it shouldn’t have changed that much.
We had a list of sights that we wanted to visit during our trip but unfortunately many were booked out. We were lucky enough to get one of the last two remaining spots at the York’s Chocolate Story. As the title would suggest, this one hour tour shares York’s history of chocolate making families and provides taste tests as you go. According to history, we have York to thank for the KitKat and Chocolate Orange. Let’s just hope that our next cruise ship trivia includes questions related to chocolate!
At the end of the tour you get to create your very own chocolate on a stick. I did consider making something that resembled the male anatomy but thought better of it as the children around us watched on. Instead I came away with a so called halloween pumpkin covered in wafer and sprinkles. I don’t think I will be changing profession to a chocolatier any time soon.
Unable to get into the Jorvik Viking Centre (bloody school holidays), we instead headed to the Castle Museum. Their suggested 2-3 hour visit was done in an hour as our tired feet were ready for reprieve. The site of Dick Turpin’s prison cell and costumes and nicknacks from the Victorian era was completed. Opposite the museum was the Clifford Tower. Unfortunately my feet and body were not going to brave the climb. Instead a photo (pretty insta ready if you ask me) was enough of a visit before heading to the bus to head home. We did walk past a special street though ‘Whip-Ma-Whop-Ma-Gate’. Imagine telling people your address!
So that brings me to our drive home. I want to preamble my next statements with a ‘I love the British. I married a Brit’. Our drive home took nearly three hours and raised my blood pressure to a level that no amount of medication was going to help. I have some advice for the British drivers that just might be useful.
1. The indicator is that little stick on the side of your steering wheel and is useful for letting others know where you would like to move to.
2. The speed limit that is posted is not a recommendation, it is there for a reason. Audi and Mercedes drivers should especially take note of point two. There must be a reason that I have sold my Audi and Mercedes.
3. Leaving a car length between cars on a motorway is helpful when the speed suddenly changes from 70 miles an hour to 40 miles an hour. It is even more helpful when there is a sudden complete stop. Note to drivers: 10cm is not sufficient breaking space.
4. Point 1-3 is even more important for massive trucks. How on earth there wasn’t a multitude of accidents on the way home has got me beat.
5. Town planners could reconsider the width of streets. Two way streets are most effective when they have the width of two cars. A one point five car width is just problematic. Throw in cars that park on the side of the road facing both directions and you are just asking for trouble……or increased blood pressure.
Needless to say, the drive home wasn’t the most enjoyable part of my birthday. Arriving nearly three hours later, I was thanking god (yes the one that would have burnt me down in the church if I had of paid) that I was going to make it to 51 and one day!
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