A little bit of Germany in Japan

Having split up from my travel buddies, today was a solo visit to Umeda for a little retail therapy. My therapy was destined for failure when you come from a hot climate and the general Japanese fashion at the moment involves wool and fur. Three hours, many steps and no shopping bags in hand, I claimed defeat and headed for lunch. Putting my slightly ASD know where I am tendencies aside (probably an understatement), I decided to traipse underground and find somewhere to eat. Putting caution to the wind, I headed off in the labyrinth of underground walkways in search of food. In all honesty, my new found courage of not knowing where I was going may have been due to my having cellphone having service.

Several basements down and in the middle of who knows where, I stumbled across a food hall where you could design your own udon. In very organise Japanese style, you ordered your broth (thank goodness for visuals), picked your tempura topping (vegetable and chicken) and shuffled along the line. A bit like the lunch process in a prison, minus the terrible food and criminals, I shelled out a whole 590 yen and found a table. Speaking of criminals, Japan never ceases to amaze me. Sitting in the food court enjoying my udon, the lady opposite me finished her lunch and left. A good 15 minutes later she came running back to find her handbag was still sitting on the chair where she had left it. People had come and gone sitting beside it and it was just left there. Try that in Australia!

After six hours of epic shopping failure, I headed back to the hotel to catch up with the others and visit the German Xmas Markets. This annual event under the Umeda Sky Building attempts to bring a bit of Xmas cheer to the country that doesn’t actually celebrate Xmas. A winner for me as it basically involves food. I couldn’t help but capture a photo of of German pizza. Not quite sure what German pizza entails but I left it be.

Instead it was the customary pretzel and a cup full of hot potato with pepper and bacon. You needed glasses to find the bacon but I am sure there was some in there. The hot potato definitely helped warm you up a freezing night.

Braving the cold we headed to the Hikari Light Festival where the Town Hall is animated with Xmas celebrations. The Cairns Library tried a similar thing earlier this year but was dismal in comparison to this display. In very orderly Japanese fashion, the crowds shuffled into the watching area. Deciding to rest our weary feet, we chose to sit on the road curbing. Guarantee of piles tomorrow as it was bloody freezing. If the risk of piles wasn’t enough, getting up from the ground was just as risky. Those of us who are a little more mature than others (and wearing far too tight jeans) took a little longer to make it to our feet.

So I am a gambler! Gambling with the rain in Kyoto.

Today’s adventure was a day trip out to Kyoto to show my travel buddies around traditional Japan. Our first stop was Fushimi Inari Shrine in Southern Kyoto. I had planned to hike to the top (who am I kidding?) but decided to take an easy stroll and spend the day with my friends. That’s the story and I am sticking to. As is the case in most Japanese destinations, the place was heaving with people. Bloody tourists. Having been to the shrine many times before, my enjoyment came from pit stops at the street food vendors and people watching.

I managed a little bit of photo bombing and definitely chose more appropriate sight seeing footwear than some (go the UGGS!). One really should question their choice of footwear when they have to be held up by another person when walking. I’m glad to see that my choice of footwear isn’t as bad as others.

I did come across one sign that could get lost in translation. Yes it does mean ‘do not sit on the steps’ but I am sure it could be interpreted in many a way. Where were the public toilets?

With rain forecast, it was a gambling game if tight arse Tanya was going to shell out 500 yen for an umbrella. Deciding to throw caution to the wind (or was it rain) I strolled the streets umbrella free. 18km of walking, multiple Japanese Santas, a quick pit stop for lunch and no UGG blow out and it was time to head to the light festival. Our visit to Kyoto just happened to coincide with the last night of the once a year Hanatoro Arashiyama festival.

As fate would have it, on arrival at Arashiyama the rain decided to make an appearance. My gambling days were well and truly over (mind you I did still debate as to the purchasing as rain drops appeared) and it was umbrella time. I did have a win with finding a 400 yen umbrella though.

I’m not sure if it was the rain or the fact it was the last night of the festival, but the crowds were not near as bad as the last time I came. I was anticipating a repeat of the claustrophobic shoulder to shoulder walk through the bamboo forest, but there was room to move this time and my wide load was safe.

Having walked 18km and had the magic signal from my Apple Watch that I had set a new active calories burnt, I made the executive decision to try a fried cheese stick. Not quite sure if the ‘plane cheese’ involved airplanes, but the thought of a warm gooey dinner (who can go wrong with fried?) in the wet and cold was somewhat appealing. I had burnt 900 calories through exercising so it was justifiable. It was reasonably tasty and enjoyable, until the cold air cooled the melted cheese making it near impossible to chew through. Any thoughts of lady like eating went out the window.

One strange find today was in the toilet of the restaurant we stopped for lunch. Next to the toilet was a hand basin to wash your hands. It would appear that the hand basin has the dual purpose of a men’s urinal. Not quite sure why a hand basin would have urinal blocks in the bottom but it made for interesting conversation whilst eating lunch. Thank goodness for chopsticks! Note to self: remember to pack hand wash next time.

I also stumbled across these very interesting cards. Not quite sure why a round, naked man needs a speech bubble but there must be a reason.

Tripophobia is a real thing…..honest

Last month I found out I had a very dangerous disease. One of my friends was kind enough to tag me in a Facebook post explaining my ailment. I’ve been officially diagnosed with Tripophobia. Apparently it is very serious and can have major side effects. Basically it is the fear of not having any travel trips currently booked. Thank goodness for this very kind friend as I now know what medication will relieve me of the symptoms (basically nagging Simon until my countdown app has multiple trips).

So before you say it, yes I am in Japan again. But it is purely medicinal….honest! Again I thank my wonderful and patient husband for not having an issue with me heading off while he has to work. It’s definitely been a countdown to my home away from home, Osaka. There’s something therapeutic about coming back to somewhere so familiar, where you don’t have to think about anything.

For a few days there I thought that my new disease’s medication was going to be cancelled. It was a very nervous couple of days where Cyclone Owen returned to Oz and was heading right for us.

I had flashbacks to my less that sympathetic comments of people stuck at airports having a moan and groan about their flights being cancelled because of ash clouds. Really, as if an airline can control Mother Nature. Determined not to be the next complainer, I did the adult thing and checked the weather website hourly for three days. Yes I know that doesn’t actually change the weather, but I did manage to increase my anxiety and annoy everyone around me. As it turns out, Cyclone Owen missed us with more than room to spare and my bad karma didn’t come back to bite me.

I did however manage to start my flight in 1F which results in the customary glass of sparkling vinegar before take off. Determined to get my money’s worth (who am I kidding?) I managed half a glass before claiming defeat and providing feedback that they really should consider serving Mumm or Verve.

Now that I think about it, perhaps my not so useful feedback (as if they don’t know their pretend champagne isn’t terrible) lead to my later THREE experiences of using the toilet and it somehow managing to automatically flush whilst I was still seated….mid pee might I add. Thank goodness I wasn’t endeavoring number 2! One time is a technical malfunction. Three times and I am starting to think conspiracy! Private zone still in tack (only just), I managed to finish my flight without any further problems. I did get to relive the no no zone sucking experience on the train trip into the city. The auto flush seemed to have the same malfunction mid pee. I could be a problem solver and guess that my expanded butt size has spread over the auto sensor but I am blaming technology. No way am I admitting to a big butt.

Finally making it to Namba, some Christmas lights in the freezing cold was called for before heading to bed. Every effort was made to capture the beautiful set up without people. Somehow people managed to pop up from nowhere.

Perhaps a little underwhelmed

It was an early start to our day in Muroran thanks to someone (clue one: there’s only two in our cabin) getting up at stupid o’clock, a.k.a. 5.45, to go running. Even a spacious mini suite doesn’t allow for a sleep in when one of the two passengers (clue two: it wasn’t me) is banging around in the dark getting dressed. Firstly, who in their right mind gets up at stupid o’clock to run when they are on holidays (especially when it is 6 degrees outside)? Secondly, who in their right mind creates a moody (well moodier) wife by cutting her sleep short? The culprit is just lucky they couldn’t see the death stare in the dark!

Having started the day in such a chirpy great mood (insert a crap load of sarcasm), the news that there was no FREE shuttle into town did little to brighten tight arse Tanya’s day. Having found very little information on this port we were taking a punt that the ¥1000 per person shuttle available was going to pay off with lots of great things to see. As it turns out the shuttle was actually a hop-on-hop-off style bus with six stops around the town. With things looking up and a not so cranky Tanya, we headed to the self proclaimed ‘modern downtown’ area in search of a Starbucks for coffee and WiFi prior to starting our sight seeing adventures. Given that Osaka and Tokyo have a Starbucks on every second corner, how hard could it be? As it turns out the ‘modern’ area, as advised by the very friendly bus support person, actually ended up being a few supermarkets and hairdressing salons (Simon’s fro is starting to grow). What was actually making our mission worse was that a high percentage of stores don’t open on weekends and it just so happened that today is a special holiday making it a double whammy. Our search for a coffee shop was an epic failure. Was this the Westaway travel curse morphing? I did stumble across a pretty modern toilet in the area though. The perfect size for my stumpy little legs! Not too sure about what I am meant to do (or not do) with the toilet paper though.

Our third stop actually offered a beautiful view of the coastline. Cape Chikyu appeared a very popular area with tourists and locals alike. Even the freezing winds weren’t keeping people away. It appeared that our sight seeing adventure was finally beginning. A short hike up the cape, mandatory photos and we retreated to the confines of the heated bus. If there had been brass monkeys at the top their balls would be frozen off!

Having built up an appetite, our mission was now in search of food and our next stop was apparently the old downtown and offered cafes, restaurants and shopping. That was, when it wasn’t a special holiday. We were however, greeted by a special ‘welcome festival’ that had been talked up when we bought our bus tickets. Consisting of a handful of craft and food tents (don’t get excited as steamed eggs just wouldn’t cut it) we all had a giggle at the enormity of the festival (there goes that sarcasm again).

We did cross paths with a dog that gave yesterday’s dog a run for it’s money. It isn’t every day that you get to see a dog dressed up in a custom made ‘dog kimono’.

Having completed the loop, we called it a day. The lure of warm and never ending food of the ship was all too luring. All aboard for our 6 days at sea en route to Alaska!

Do we need beer goggles?

Several years ago Simon and I visited Hakodate. If you actually call being at Hakodate station to swap trains in a 10 hour journey from Tokyo to Sapporo, then we visited. Mind you we nearly had a longer stay than the 30 minute transition as it was mid winter and the tracks were deep with snow and the trains (in very unlike Japanese fashion) were running late. Little did we know what a wonderful town was at our fingertips.

With a bit of a shock to the system, we were up and at em for an 8.30 start to the day. Well some of us were ready for an 8.30 start as another couple (that shall not be named), were knocking at our cabin door at 8.15 with the notion that we had agreed on an earlier time. Given that they are older than us, I’m thinking their memory of the conversation on the previous night seems to have slipped into wrinkly confusion.

Jumping on the free shuttle (bingo again!) we arrived downtown with our first mission to grab a decent hot drink and suck up some free WiFi. Exiting the shuttle we were greeted by a group of school girls who informed us they had the day off (was I condoning wagging?) and were there to help visitors. Sharing our mission with the girls, they had a few giggles before they walked us down the street, across the road and pointed us in the direction of the trams. With a bit of finger pointing translation (got to love maps), they pointed out the tram stop and where the local ‘Starbucks’ could be located. Day passes for the trams purchased and we were on our way.

Caffeine levels filled and the catching up of emails (yay the sale of the house is still going through) our first ‘sightseeing’ stop was Mt Hakodate. There’s something great about adventuring out on your own. Unlike the cattle herding tour groups we passed, we wandered up to the Mt Hakodate Ropeway at our own pace (remember Tanya is vertically challenged with stumpy legs) and enjoyed the short, but scenic, cable car trip up the mountain. For a while we thought that the Westaway travel curse was going to result in rain, but fortunately we were lucky enough to just experience freezing cold wind. The views were spectacular and really worth the visit. Not so sure on the choice of caramels in the gift shop though. Opting to leave the mutton caramels on the shelf (yep it was a really hard choice), I opted for the safer melon caramel. Given that they include fruit, they must be good for me!

The town itself is an eclectic mix of different architecture. A very picturesque town with a colonial feel. As we wandered the streets we not only stumbled across beautiful old buildings but also some not so beautiful people. Now I’m not making fun of other’s appearances. Hey, those in glass houses should never throw stones! It never ceases to amaze me how people can visit places and openly complain about a plethora of ridiculous things. My favourite is ‘the people don’t speak English’. I wasn’t even on their tour, but as we crossed paths, I was reminded why I avoid organised tours at all cost (flashbacks to that ship tour in China). I would love to set up my own sightseeing company and have a ‘you complain you’re out’ rule. Kudos to the Japanese tour guide that was showing these miserable people around.

Starting to get hungry (yep it was actually nearly 5 hours since breakfast…..minus the lollies from the snack shop), we headed in the direction of the Bay Area. Only in Japan can you cross paths with a white fluffy ball who is better groomed (and better dressed) than yourself. Now we did stumble across the ‘second most delicious ice cream’ and were very tempted to try one as a pre lunch appetizer. I was just too concerned that I would be too disappointed with it not being the first most delicious ice cream so we continued on our way.

On previous trips to Japan we have visited the Sapporo and Yebisu Beer Factory (the things you do for the one you love). It was no surprise that when the boys realised that there was a Hakodate Beer Hall right in the town, lunch plans were set in stone. That was until it seemed to not be where they anticipated. Some womanly map navigation and we were finally able to eat. I’ve previously blogged about my views on beer. Beer all tastes the same to me (standby for further proof of this). It bloats me (as if my body needs any further expanding) so it’s not a go to choice to quench the thirst. It was just like ESP when my prediction that the three tray beer taster would prove my point. According to the boys I am incorrect but I stand by my theory as they all tasted the same (as if a woman would EVER say she was wrong).

Having visited Japan many a time, I have been blessed to have seen cherry blossom at its best. Being in the northern island, Hakodate has a later bloom and the trees in Goryokaku Park are just coming to the end of their best bloom. Never before have I blended in so well with my ‘matchy matchy’ pink beanie though. In true Jon style, it was like playing ‘where’s Wally’ again as he attempted to photograph every single bloom in the enormous park. Ok a slight exaggeration but we did spend quite a bit of time there.

Plans to go up the Goryokaku Tower for an aerial view of the park were aborted. I would love to say that the enormous line up was the sole contributing factor, but it may have had something to do with the pop up beer stall at the base of the tower. With flash backs of my earlier statements of ‘all beer tastes the same’, I was forced to admit that the Sakura beer (cherry beer) definitely tasted different.

Going round in circles

Our port stop in Sakaiminato began in a rather slow start and for once it wasn’t due to my stumpy legs. Re-entering Japan meant that we had to formally go through face to face immigration and customs again at the port (you just can’t trust those Aussies). Not realising that this would involve a tender like ticketing system to get off the ship, we had a leisurely lay in, room service breakfast and strolled to disembark without a care in the world. That was until we found that the tickets were already up to 1700 and our exit would take a little longer than anticipated. In all truth around an hour longer than anticipated. Fingerprints and photos taken (still waiting for the Japanese Government to register the amount of times I have visited and insist on a cavity search) we boarded the free (bingo for tight arse Tanya) shuttle bus into downtown. Sakaiminato is famous (depending on what constitutes famous) for the 174 bronze Yokai characters that line the streets. I particularly liked the peeing one that reminded me of time I spent in Belgium.

Having previously found very little information on this town I decided to throw my ASD, over-planned tendencies to the wind and play it by ear. Collecting a map at the tourist information centre, we decided to make our way, by train, to what appeared a touristy area one the map. The town is so big (lots and lots of sarcasm) that there was one train an hour. So with just over 45 minutes to kill we decided to use the free WiFi in the train station and escape the rain and wind (thanks Westaway travel curse). Now this would have been an excellent idea except for the lack of ability to connect to the WiFi. Luckily I had forgotten to load my previous blog onto my phone so I brushed off the lack of WiFi and found my way to the gift shop for some snacks. It had been at least 2 hours since I had eaten (I will blame the immigration process) so a top up of calories wouldn’t go astray.

The Yokai character theme continued when the train finally arrived with the exterior and interior being adorned with characters. At this point, the fact that the train consisted of one carriage should have alerted us to an error in our judgement in heading to the ‘tourist looking area’. The long wait had tested Mr ADHD so his camera was out and he attempted to sneakily photograph people on the train. Note to Jon that a huge camera with a telescopic lens isn’t an appropriate way to covertly take photos of people.

Finally arriving at our destination, I started second guessing our decision as it would appear that we were in the middle of nowhere. Off on foot we headed in the direction of the apparent touristy looking area as the rain and wind made the walk a really enjoyable (full load of sarcasm) experience. They say that travel is an adventure so we took it in our stride (and a lot of them were made). The lady at the information desk had told us that the walk would take around 15 minutes. Just over 30 minutes later, walking through an industrial area we caught glimpse of our ship and it appeared that we had spent all up just over an hour and a half to do a loop to be only a couple of kilometres from the ship. We seriously could have walked it quicker! We did however get to pass a really classy house where I am sure that the owners belonged on an episode of The Hoarders.

I guess there is nothing like taking the scenic route through an industrial area to finally reach the ‘fish market’. Having seen several fish markets over the past few days, this fish market was more like a supermarket but had the added bonus of free taste testing of the goodies (minus the seafood). Just like a game of Russian Roulette, tasting what would appear a delicious pastry has a fifty fifty chance of containing delicious (yep there’s that sarcasm again) red bean paste. A long walk done (at least I worked off some of those train station snacks), we got to see a giant sized Yokai character at the front of the market. Now what was really entertaining was the fact that there was a huge sign advertising a free shuttle to the cruise ship that was ten minutes away. Just so you laugh at our experience, we started at the green circle, got a shuttle bus to the red circle, a train to the yellow circle and walked to the blue circle. Nothing like taking the long route!

We could have walked a bit further to a park but decided what any good Aussie would do in the wind and rain and head towards the Big M on the map for a bit of free WiFi and toilets. I honestly can’t remember the last time I ate McDonalds, but it got us out of the cold and gave us a chance to reconnect with the world. I’m pretty sure that there was a little worker out back though that thought that we had sucked up enough of the free internet and started hitting the disconnect button intermittently to move us on. Claiming defeat from the weather and deciding that the less than 10 minute shuttle back was a wiser decision that the hour and a half train/shuttle trip back (go figure) we headed back to the ship.

Simon did our washing this morning (what a great husband) and he likes to tumble dry. I on the other hand believe that clothes shrink in tumble driers so avoid the evil machines at all expenses. Or it could be that tight arse Tanya likes to avoid paying for the tumble drier. So washing done, I grabbed a pair of undies out this morning to find that they appeared tighter. I am blaming Simon and his tumble drier (he apparently says that they are synthetic and don’t shrink) as I can’t imagine that my butt could have grown so much in one week (well it has been one week and two days so perhaps). God help Jon if any of my butt photos find their way to Facebook (not so subtle warning!). It’s been a few days since I posted any food photos so I thought I would put some food porn into this blog. I wouldn’t want anyone to worry I’m not eating.

Dinner last night was quite an experience. We always opt for a sharing table as you get to meet so many wonderful people, learn about other countries and if you are really lucky make friends to keep in touch with. Last night I had the pleasure (I’m calling it character building) of being seated next to a gentleman who really made me warm to him (I’m excelling at sarcasm today) when he asked if I had ever done anything other than being a homemaker as he continued to tell me about all of the places around the world he had been to and what you could do at them (I didn’t need telling as I had been to most of them and definitely didn’t appreciate his chauvinistic condescending manner). Biting my tongue, I transferred my growing rage and focused on Jon as he engaged in conversation with this fellow whilst swinging his hands around with a breadstick in hand. Angela was lucky to escape with her eyeballs as Jon waved his breadstick around, preferring to use it as an extension of his finger rather than eating it. Now Jon was giving me ideas on how to cope with my annoyance as I had visions of where a breadstick could be inserted!

Today has been a leisurely sea day on our way to Hokadate, Hokkaido. Some card playing, trivia and a presentation from an owner of one of the ships from the Deadliest Catch. It really was a great presentation as he shared stories of his life crabbing in the Bering Sea. I have to say, this was a great presentation leading up to our crossing from Japan to Alaska. Nothing like getting a ship full of passengers prepared for massive seas. Note to self: locate life jacket prior to crossing.

Up until today we have been blessed with the flattest of waters. Being a sea day, I started the day with morning laps of the promenade deck. Scooting between the oldies (finally found humans that walk slower than me), I was starting to work up a sweat although the wind was freezing and everyone else was rugged up in coats. Just as I was feeling I was getting somewhere (other than circling), the front of the ship was closed off due to the strong winds. What a shame that my morning walk had to be cut short (wink wink).